Ares jokes

Girl, you must be a Muslim because you are da bomb.

What do you do when you're sad?

Nothing, because you are just crying about something happening to you.

If you think your life is bad, then people are discussing the gender of Mr. Potato Head.

Why can't you do a Math test in the zoo?

Because there are too many Cheetahs!

I'm shidding. Still babies are still coming and going.

What animal jumps the highest?

An emo kid, some of them are still up there.

Your eyebrows and hairline are so far apart that when Dora the Explorer went and found your hairline and was trying to find your eyebrows, the map couldn't even tell her.

What did the seal say to the shark?

"Are you seal-iously going to eat me?"

These jokes are the bomb, I rate them 9 out of 11.

I would tell you a joke about meat, but the stakes are too high.

Your arms are open. They stretch towards me, Reaching, grabbing, pulling me, Surrounding me, Drowning me in my helplessness. Time standing still, inside here. Looking through windows, time passing by. Let me go, will ya?

Mum: Why are you throwing a paper plane at the twins?

Me: 😈

Are you a marry, because you are my mother?

I am not telling you twice, your mouth stinks, so go burn your house down like a crazy mad woman, and I will call the cops like, "WTH," because you are so fat.

I gave my sister a compliment and said she's pretty, then while she was saying thanks, I said, "pretty ugly."

Me: You are pretty. Her: Thanks. Me: Pretty ugly.

When do you know your dad knows you are sneaking out? He hears the loud creaks.

Apparently terrorists and Japs are the same; they both went kamikaze.

"Why are all these orphans here?" said Chris.

"Because their dad went to go get the milk," said MrBeast.

3 Years Later,

"I AM GIVING APPLE IN A SHARE TO EVERY ORPHAN IN THE WORLD, AND I'M ALSO GIVING EACH OF THEM 1000000000000 DOLLARS."

Why is the world split in half? Because fat people are weighing the Earth down.

What type of people have the world record for most stories read in the shortest amount of time?

Emos, some of them are still in the air.