Ares jokes

Teacher

  • Little Johnny and his teacher were telling each other jokes and riddles. His teacher asked, "Three birds were sitting on a wire, a hunter shot one. How many are left?" Little Johnny replied, "None, because the sound would scare the other two away." His teacher said, "No, but I like the way you think!"

    Little Johnny replied, "Alright, now I have one for you. What goes in dry and hard and comes out soft and hard?" His teacher was shocked and said, "Little Johnny!" He replied, "It's gum! But I like the way you think!"

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    Orphan

  • "Stop telling these orphan jokes!! Maybe some people that read these are orphans!"

    I'll stop telling orphan jokes when their parents come back.

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    Makeup

  • Me: Mom, can I have some makeup?

    Mom: No. You are beautiful just the way you are.

    Me: So that’s why you wear makeup?

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    Fat

  • Your momma's so fat she started "Fat Lives Matter". Meetings are everyday:

    11 o'clock McDonald's, 12 o'clock KFC, 1 o'clock Pizza Hut.

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    Power

  • When you tell her you are about to "COME," she says no, don't, please just keep going.

    Shenron: THAT IS BEYOND MY POWER.