Appearance jokes

Why are you so fat? I bet you take after your mom more.

You look so pretty. Not at all gross today.

You are so fat that the waiter said to you every time: "Sorry for your weight" instead of "Sorry for the wait."

Your hairline is so far back you ain't got a fo'head, you got a five head!

When the ugliest cat looked at you, then you search up the ugliest thing in the world, you show up.

Yo mama so fat, everyday people kept asking: "Are you pregnant?"

I was at a farm in France called ‘Uber eats Farmer league’, then I saw a strange creature called ‘Pessi’. He only appears against farmers.

He ran towards to me, I didn’t know what I should do so I decided to shout “Big games! Big games!“ Pessi scurried away.

Yo momma is so ugly, she gets rejected by dead people.

Luckily for you, mirrors can't talk, and luckily for you, they can't laugh either.

This girl told me people call her ugly because she is disabled. I told her to stand up for herself.

Your hairline is so ugly, even Dora the Explorer can’t even do it.

What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit?

A zit will wait until you’re twelve before it comes on your face.

Michael Jackson's nose is so steep, it can be a ski ramp.

You're so ugly your mirror shattered.

You're so ugly the densest told you to lay face down.

Friend, you're bold and fat.

Me: Bro, go to the bathroom and look at the mirror. You will probably break it.

Yo mama so ugly, when she went to unlock her phone with her face, it said, "disconnected."

Your forehead is so big, Megamind thought he was your long lost sibling.

Your forehead is so big that Mastermind thought you were his long lost brother!

I cry when you leave the room. They're tears of joy because you have an ugly hairline.