ANS jokes
So I told my sister, "Want [to] hear some jokes?" and she was like, "Hit me with [your] best shot, fire away," and I was like, "Okay, I know [you're] singing an old song, yeah I was trying to see if [you] sing too," and I said, "Who do [you] think I am, Chris Brown?"
My life is such an udder disappointment. What an udder failure!
If I busted an egg on your head... The yolk would be on you... hahaha...
What do you call a baby in an elevator?
Lubrication.
What do you say when you see an apple dancing in a talent show?
He's got some "sweet" moves!
What do you call an owl that does magic?
Hooodini.
I told a joke to an orphan, turns out he wasn't an orphan...
One day, there was an ugly barnacle. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end!
Are you an egg? 'Cause your jokes ain't funny.
What's the difference between an egg and a wank?
You can beat an egg, but you can't beat a wank.
At an school 🏫 what is your school's name?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
Stop acting like an owl!
When you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
What's the difference between an orphan and an Egyptian?
Egyptians have mummies.
An orphan's family photo: empty.
What's the difference between a bad joke and an actually bad joke?
An actually bad joke is not funny, like this one!
How are an emo kid and a hanging child the same?
Depends on who's hanging.
A bullet is like an arrow.
Nothing can stop it from going through your head.
What do you call an orphan who can't get 5 stars on GTA?
Not wanted.
EXPERIMENT SUCCESSFUL 😱😱 Scientists have created an element named Pessomium 😳😳
Characteristics: - Highly reactive only in Bolivia and Panama 😡🤬 - Turns invisible when in Brazil or Uruguay 🥵🤧 - Finished 😹🤕 - 0 protons 0 electrons 0 goals 0 assists 7 debuts 🥶