ANS jokes

What do you call an empty police station?

Banana Chicken.

So today an old lady asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her... Hhah.

I'd say you were the spawn of Satan, but that would be an insult to Satan.

Being an orphan is crazy and fuck gay people.

Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because they don't know where home is.

I've never been to Bradford before until today. While driving through the city center with my dad I asked, "Would you set up a business here?", to which he responded "No".

So I asked "Why not, you'd make us rich!", He gave me a confused face and asked, "How so?".

So I said, "Because sales would be fucking booming!"

I know, it's an awful joke.

What do you call a black guy on the moon?

YOU RACISTS! An astronaut!

Why did the amogus act sus? He was an amogus! hahahahahahahahahahahaahahaha

You're so ugly your mom said, "I want an abortion."

Q: What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

A: One of them gets picked.

What is an emo's least favorite game? Fruit Ninja.

I got an F in science. F stands for Fantastic!

What do you call an elephant and a rhino mix?

Helliphino!

There is a really, really small guy and his name is Adam, so I say, "Hey, look, it's an atom!"

FaceBook Story: My mom loves FaceBook; she literally posts every day, but this day was sort of a hard hit.

So what happened was my mom got tired of her old name on Facebook, so she changed it to Thatmilf85, and I don't want to explain what milf means, but she got a lot of DM's from a lot of old guys. BUT, this one exact guy named Johnny Sins asked my mom if she wanted to do an adult film. I don't know what that is. I think it's an adult movie, of course, so she says yes and flies out to San Diego, and she never came back after yesterday, and to YOU Johnny Sins, my mom better be Ok and that adult film better be an adult movie and not a por...

An old Indian was buried on the side of a hill. What did he say?

Nothing, he was dead.

Two guys are on a plane. One of the guys' name is Jack. The other is Peter.

Peter: "Hi Jack."

Flight Attendant: "You're going to hijack the plane?!?"

Jack: "No, my name is Ja-"

Flight Attendant: "Everybody stay calm! These two men are going to hijack the plane!"

Jack: "No, no. My name is Jack and my friend here is an idiot."

Yo mama is so short, Minions look down at her.

Yo mama is so fat that she volunteered for the Hunger Games 'cause she thought it was an eating competition.

Yo mama is so ugly when Santa Claus saw her, he yelled "Ho Ho Holy Sh*t!"

Yo mama is so old, when she walked into an antique store, they didn't let her leave.

Yo mama is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.

If an orphan was an animal, it would be an owl because they don't know "WHOOO" their parents are.

If you're ever bored, adopt an orphan. What is he going to do, be kissed by Vedanta?