ANS jokes
Do you know why no one speaks about George Washington?
John Adams turned him into atoms. John Adams was an alien.
A bullet is like an arrow.
Nothing can stop it from going through your head.
How are an emo kid and a hanging child the same?
Depends on who's hanging.
What's the difference between a bad joke and an actually bad joke?
An actually bad joke is not funny, like this one!
What do you call an orphan who can't get 5 stars on GTA?
Not wanted.
An orphan's family photo: empty.
EXPERIMENT SUCCESSFUL 😱😱 Scientists have created an element named Pessomium 😳😳
Characteristics: - Highly reactive only in Bolivia and Panama 😡🤬 - Turns invisible when in Brazil or Uruguay 🥵🤧 - Finished 😹🤕 - 0 protons 0 electrons 0 goals 0 assists 7 debuts 🥶
I just read an article that Texas is number one in the nation for both depression and infidelity in relationships.
It's a sad state of affairs.
What is an orphan's least favorite store?
Home Depot.
What's an asthma patient’s least favorite vegetable?
An arti-“choke”!
What would be Joe Biden's name if he was an orphan? "Joe."
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
"Orphans get picked."
An autistic kid.
Why is it OK to hit an orphan?
Because they can’t tell their parents.
Why is 8 scared of 7?
Because 7 8 9. If you think it doesn't make sense, then it is "7 ate 9."
Son, why do I not have an Easter basket?
Mom, you're 23, you don't need one. Ends calls, child support.
What can't an orphan spell?
Home.
What do you call a once that's an insect?
A creepy crawly.
What do you call a female octopus? An octopussy.
I dated an orphan and then later married him for 7 years until he told me he was an orphan.