ANS jokes
Science experts say when you get mad, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
You're an orphan.
What is the difference between an emo kid and a jug of milk?
The milk doesn't hang itself after it gets dumped.
There's nothing stronger than love, except for an M32 Rotary Grenade Launcher because fuck you and everyone near you.
I tried to get into an emo bar, but I didn't make the cut.
Memes
Q. What's the difference between an abortion clinic and Uber Eats?
Abortion clinics don't do deliveries.
If I had a dollar for every time a rap hater made an intelligent statement, I’d be more broke than the rap haters.
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
For when he made it RAIN in the club.
What is an orphan's most relatable movie?
"Home Alone."
What do you call an injured Panera Bread?
Panera Bled.
What do you call an angry Panera Bread?
Panera slapped!
What do you call an Indian?
Person in red. Cart a pack of Maltesers.
Why are Spider-Man and an orphan so similar?
They both have "No Way Home."
What does an orphan say a lot? "Where is my house?"
If an apple and a depressed kid fall out of a tree, which one hits the ground first? The apple.
The kid just hangs there.
What's the difference between an umbrella and a tree?
I don't know.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because they can't find home.
Your forehead is so big your mum spent an extra hour in the birth delivery room.
Q. Why did the boy fall off his bike?
A. His mom threw an oven at him.
What's the best way to get an emo out of a tree?
Cut the rope.