ANS jokes

Q: Why are flat-earthers seen so many these days? A: Because one girl wore an earth-printed shirt.

I had an Alzheimer's joke, but something's fogging up my mind.

What’s the difference between an orphan’s parents and a boomerang?

The boomerang came back.

Yo mama so fat that John Cena couldn’t get her down with an Attitude Adjustment!

What do you call an orphan with a gun?

(No) home shooter.

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?

For when he made it RAIN in the club.

There's nothing stronger than love, except for an M32 Rotary Grenade Launcher because fuck you and everyone near you.

If I had a dollar for every time a rap hater made an intelligent statement, I’d be more broke than the rap haters.

If I worked for Edexcel, I'd give Caroline Flack an A* for her physics experiment.

What is an orange?

World's only not rhyming thing. Hehhhehehehehhe.

What's an orphan's favorite sport?

Tennis because it's the only love they'll get.

You can't give an orphan homework.

If Stephen Hawking was an Xbox... he just red ringed and rose up to GameStop.

What do you call an appetite including apples? Appletite.

There was an enemy with a machine gun.

My commander said, "Un-arm the enemy."

So I ran over to the enemy and chopped his arms off.

Why can't an orphan go on away games?

Their parent will never show up!

So if I drink alcohol, you're an alcoholic. But if I drink Fanta, I’m fantastic.

How do you spot an English man in Quebec?

A square head.

Mr. Nobody: Water you thinkin's happenin', Ol' Mr. Atlantic?

Mr. Atlantic: Something Smells Fishy...

Mr. Nobody: Well, duh, you idiot! You're an Ocean!

Mr. Atlantic: WTH!?!?????

If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?