ANS jokes
What type of clock is both cringe and an app?
TikTok.
Why can't orphans go to an amusement park?
Because they don't have parents!
God promised John that if he came in 1st, he would get an eternal life, but instead he came in 5th and got a kettle!
How do you know Thor has your back?
He's an Asgardian (ass guardian).
What do Roblox bots do that's both a type of meat and an annoying thing?
Spam.
What do you get when you cross an adopted kid with a river?
Moses hits the adoption lottery!
If two people who have the clap sleep together, did they make an applause?
What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? An extraction.
Why does an orphan play soccer?
Because it's the only love they get.
What do you call your son?
An mistake.
When you're mad, you might as well just punch an orphan because what can they do, tell their parents?
What phone do orphans have?
An iPhone 10R.
There's an orphan in my class... For some reason, he never leaves.
Q: What’s the difference between a sleeping lady and an onion?
A: One doesn’t scream when you try to chop it up.
Kid: Hey, Dad.
Dad: You're an hour late.
Kid: No, it was two hours. Also, I was working on math.
Dad: By yourself?
Kid: No.
Dad: A boy?
Kid: I was with the teacher.
Once I saw a retard and an Alberta separatist having a conversation.
Well, actually, it was just the Alberta separatist talking to himself.
If you're having a bad day, just slap an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their parents?
How are baseball and an orphan different?
A baseball game you can do a home run.
If you’re bored, just punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Today is Elder Abuse Awareness Day.
Unfortunately, they're still not giving lessons on how to beat an annoying Alzheimer's patient without leaving a mark.