ANS jokes

I joined an emo class today. The first lesson I learned was slice and dice and let it flow.

A cow is an earthquake, it's a milkshake.

What's an orphan's least favorite store?

Family Dollar.

What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple? An apple gets picked.

Circumcision is like getting your dick sucked by a male. If you did not like it when you were a teenager, you probably will not like it when you become an adult.

I did a knock knock joke to an orphan. I said, "Knock knock." He said, "Who is there?" And I said, "Not your parents."

When you get mad, just punch an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their mom?

Why does a leaf fall faster than an emo kid? Because the emo hangs itself.

Little Johnny went up to his mom and said: "Can I have some milk?"

He waited for three hours to get an answer.

His mom finally said: "No, your dad still isn't back with it."

What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?

... family photo.

This guy looked down the aisle and asked, "Hey, are those kids all yours?" And I replied: "No, I work for a condom company, and these kids are just all of my complaints."

What do you call an arrow pointing the wrong way?

A Disap point ment.

"Lizzie Borden took an axe. And gave her mother forty whacks. When she saw what she had done, She gave her father forty-one."

What type of cookie has an orphan never had? Home made cookies ;)

Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction after eating 12-year-old nuts.

What is an orphan's favorite movie? Hint, not Home Alone. It's actually Batman, 'cause they are 50% the same as him.

If an orphan takes a photo... Well done! It's a family photo!

Titanic walks into a bar. Britannic: "What would you like to drink?" Titanic: "An iceberg."

Where would an astronaut park his spaceship? A parking meteor.

What Spider-Man movie does an orphan like? Homecoming.