ANS jokes

Sleep

  • What are you doing, son? It has been an hour, and you are still in front of the mirror closing your eyes.

    Mum, actually I want to see how I look while sleeping...

    Phobia

  • Albert is a homophobic guy. His cousin Franco is also a homophobic guy.

    Albert's aunt and cousin have visited his parents, but Albert didn't know that because he came late at night. Franco was sleeping in Albert's bed, thinking he would not come home. Albert laid on his bed, thinking there was no one on it, and then they started fucking ^_*

    No phobia lasts forever 👌😂

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  • Ancestry.com

  • I asked my new girlfriend how many men she’d had before me.

    She said not to worry, she could count them all on one hand.

    Unfortunately, this was when I noticed she’s holding her cell phone with a calculator app open. I took note of her wallet inside a picture of what appeared to be 10 guys. I asked and she said that’s my fam as well. I noticed an Alabama driver's license. I asked which one was her dad. She said that she doesn’t talk to him anymore because he had sex with the boss’s daughter. I casually asked what he did for work. Self-employed? She said that’s the last time I use ancestry.com!

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  • Difference

  • What's the difference between homework and a hooker? They both start with an "H", but we all know which one we would like to do.

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  • Girl

  • A happy little girl was running on the grass. She saw two gay guys kissing in a blank space, and she started crying. The two gay guys heard her crying, and then they asked her: "Why are you crying?" The little girl answered: "This is the first time I see an unnatural nature."

    😂😂😂😂

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  • Gravity

  • An assassin threatens a planet.

    The planet remains calm.

    The assassin: "Do you not realize the gravity of this situation?"

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  • Wife

  • Two husbands walk into a bar.

    The first one says, "My wife is an angel."

    The second one says, "You're lucky, mine is still alive."

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