Animal jokes
What did the skeleton say to his dog at dinner time? Bone appétit!
God creates a wasp :)
God: Okay, so make it reeeeally tiny. Like less than half a fly.
Angel: okay... a bug.
God: now give it's face a sword, but it has a hole so it's basically a mouth.
Angel: weird.. but okay...
God: and give it wings.
Angel: eh, not half bad Go-
God: NOW MAKE IT EAT THE BLOOD OF ALL LIVING ANIMALS AND HUMANS
Angel: *shook* o-okay
God: okay. Now make sure whenever a human is bit it feels the pain of a million suns burning it, making it scratch until it bleeds out.
Angel: . - .
God: and make sure it also transfers diseases through the species. Give 'em a taste 'o that! *evil grin*
Angel: *cries*
Angel: *whispers; I'm so sorry..*
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Interrupting cow." "Interrupting cow wh-" "Moo!" 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
My dog went through my bathroom garbage, and for some reason, my sister put a bunch of ketchup packets in there...
Sad news, my obese parrot died today.
Mind you, it's a huge weight off my shoulders.
I searched up hornets and then said that it will leave a sting.
What is the difference between a white octopus and a white squid?
A white octopus isn't in the KKK!
What is the best la?
A koa-la!
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Anything you want; it won't chase you.
What did the owl that's a detective say?
"Hoo did it?"
What did The Notorious B.I.G. say to the cow?
- MOO MONEY MOO PROBLEMS
What did the bird do when he ate the expired worm?
He flew up!
Why don’t alligators grow up to 15 feet?
They only have 4.
Why are cows 🐮 so big? To scare babies 👶.
What do you call a fantastic goat?
Goatastic! So funny please like.
Why do lions 🦁 go to SUBWAY 🥪?
Because they like to EAT FLESH.
Two fish are in a tank. One says, "You man the guns, I'll drive!"
My dad said, "Where's Pickles, the family cat?" I said, "I'm sorry to say he's in the sky." He said, "Oh, I see, he passed away." No, I strapped him to 20 fireworks!
What do you call a cow that is really sad? Utterly Depressed. HEHEHEHE
What is a cow on two legs?
Yo mama!