Animal jokes
Which Roman emperor was a mouse?
Julius Cheeser.
Why did the duck cross the road to get to his quack dealer?
Why did the rooster go to the train station to get the pizza?
What's every elderly person's spirit animal? The blue tang fish.
What do you call the ghost of a chicken? A poultrygeist!
There's a new bird disease, it's called churpies.
It's a canariel disease, untweetable.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To slide into your mom's bed.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It felt like it.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To become the spicy chicken burger at Chic-fil-A.
Why do orphans like cows?
Because when they leave, they bring back the milk.
Why are chickens so funny? Because...
What do you get when you mix a cow with an earthquake??
Milkshake.
What do you call a sad rabbit? Unhoppy.
Why isn't there a sad sunglasses emoji? To show that I am happy but I'm still cool.
Why are dogs different than orphans?
Because dogs don't cry for their parents.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Nuts!
Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, he can't tell me.
What do a mole and an eagle have in common?
They live underground, except for the eagle. Lol.
Watchdogs.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to fish?
MC Hammerhead.
Hey, pass me that crowbar, please.
Sure... y’know, before the crowbar was invented, crows had to drink at home.