Animal jokes
What do you call a dead polar bear?
Anything, they can't hear you!
You look like a cow went through puberty, put the milk before the cereal, then ate it with a fork with a little sprinkle of steak.
What's a cheetah's fav food?
Fast food!
Why do cheetahs always cheat?
Why is the cheetah super good at hide and seek tag? Because he was too fast!
God is you... If you have a dog
What’s the difference between 9/11 and a dead cow?
You can’t milk a dead cow for 20 years.
What do you get when you put a vest on an alligator?
An investigator!
"Police control! Have you been drinking?"
"Go Pikachu! Thunder Clap!"
"Did you just throw a hamster at my head?"
What do you call a helicopter, elephant, and rhino?
Hellephino (Hell if I know)
Why can't you do a Math test in the zoo?
Because there are too many Cheetahs!
What do you call a pig that does Karate?
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To cut through traffic.
Our hairline goes way back before dinosaurs lived.
What happens to the crow in the earthquake?
It turned into a milkshake. 🤔😂
Why are bees' hair sticky?
Because they use honeycombs!
If a vegan and a vegan have a fight, is it still considered beef?
What is the difference between an egg and you? An egg gets laid, and you don't.
Why did the elephant get kicked out of the public pool?
Because he kept on dropping his trunks! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
There were two snakes slithering along when one snake said to the other snake, "Are we poisonous?" "Idk why?" The other snake responded, "'Cause I just bit my tongue!"
Why didn't the octopus get a tent? Because it had tentacles.