Animal jokes
What is a cow on two legs?
Yo mama!
What do you call a pig doing a karate chop?
Why do seagulls not fly over the bay?
Because if they did, they'd be bay gulls.
My friend Nickiya wanted to know what animal she'd be. I said that she would be a "Ni-cat-a."
Why did the dead baby cross the road?
It was strapped to the chicken.
Why was the cow scared? Cause he had a nightmoo-r.
What do cows call money?
Moola.
Your cow is so ugly, it scared the crap out of the toilet!
What do you call a hill with cows on it?
A Moo-ntain.
How do spiders reach the internet?
Through the World Wide Web!
Where do you find a cow with no legs?
Right where you left it!
Why does a duck have tail feathers?
To cover his butt-quack.
Your mama is so fat, she only knows three words: KFC.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To prove he wasn't a chicken.
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
A cat has claws at the end of paws; a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards?
A receding hare-line!
Where do fish sleep? On a seabed!
What is the strongest creature in the sea? A mussel!
Why don't oysters share their pearls? Because they're shellfish!
What do you call a fish without an eye?
Fsh!