Animal jokes
The Octopus joke! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
My grandfather has the heart of a lion!! 🦁
In a jar on his desk along with a lifetime ban from the zoo...
Why did the boy put a chicken 🐔 in his garden?
He wanted to grow an eggplant. 😂
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Lion 🦁.
Lion who?
Lion again, aren't you?
We hired this boy to pick up dog poop. We just remembered that we don't have a dog.
A grasshopper walked into a bar and sat down at the counter.
The bartender looked at him and said, "We have a drink named after you." The grasshopper replied, "Who names a drink Steve?"
Is your middle name Fancy Feast?
'Cause your face looks like a can of dog food.
What did one cow say to the other? You are mootiful!
My cat is red and brown and her bones are crunchy, so does that mean she is a Kit Kat?
I put my leg up in the air sometimes, singing ayo, I'm a flamingo...
Why did the dog cause the fight?
Because it was a bulldog.
What do you call a cow with no leg?
You got a black cat.
He was bad luck.
Everyone left you and you committed suicide.
What a CATastrophe!
What is shark's favorite day?
Chewsday.
Why is the cheetah so bad at hide-n-seek? Because every time she hides, she will always [be] spotted.
What did the squirrel say to the dog?
"There are nuts in your poop. I found them!"
What is Green and Red and goes round and round?
A frog in a blender.
(this next one is pretty bad, and I don't mean it, so don't get offended)
What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench?
One can support an average family.
Why did the cow cross the road?
Because the chicken was on vacation.
Why are orphanages like dogs?
Because they get adopted.
What card is the slowest and slimiest?
Ace-nail.