What is a donkey called when it has a hole on itself?
An ASSHole.
Animal Jokes
What type of bird does not have feathers on itself?
A bald eagle.
What is a rat's favorite dessert?
A chocolate mousse cake.
What is a Finnish Spitz's favorite comedian?
Redd Foxx.
"Fish, why you no fly?"
"I don't like being caught naked."
Poop + mouth = yummy for dung Beatles and HEDGEHOGS!
Why did the chicken explode? Because he pooped his pants!
Why did the chicken cross the road? To poo in the toilet.
When a hedgehog finds poop, they put it in their mouths. They mix it with saliva until it's a foam, then rub it on themselves.
What did the bull say to the bullfighter?
What's the "matador?"
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the “shell” station.
What kind of clothing should you wear on “hump day”? Camelflouge.
I was walking in the forest with my gf.
I had a Desert Eagle for protection.
A bear jumped out of the bushes; one shot was enough to put my gf down, and it gave me enough time to run away.
Why are chickens so awesome? Because... Chicken noise.
Where did the pig go on holiday?
Snout and about.
I named my dog "5 miles," so now I can tell people I walk "5 miles" everyday. 😏😎
I was reading a book about an immortal dog yesterday...
It was impossible to put down.
Two men were on a hike through a forest when one of the hikers got bit on his ass by a snake.
The other hiker ran to the village 2 miles away and explained to a doctor there what had happened. The doctor told him to cut a cross with a knife where he had been bitten and suck out the venom, so he ran back to the first hiker who asked him, "Have you got the cure?"
Hiker number two just said, "Nah mate, you're dead."
What's a snake's favorite subject?
Well, there are two: hisss-tory, but some prefer maths; those weirdos are adders.
There were two snakes slithering along when one snake said to the other snake, "Are we poisonous?" "Idk why?" The other snake responded, "'Cause I just bit my tongue!"
