America jokes
9/11 isn't something we should joke about. Some people can remember where they were when they found out. I'll never forget where I was when I found out.
It was 9:37, September 10th, 2001. I was in a cave in Iraq when my friend Mohammad told me.
Why can't America play Clash of Clans?
Because they already lost two towers.
So Mungus.
Why are Americans so good at solving Rubik’s cubes?
Because they have a history of separating colors.
A Japanese person comes to America and sees guns everywhere. One American says, "Welcome to America!"
Why do most guns in America have an average mag/clip size of only 30?
Because that's the average class size in America.
Jeff crosses the US border.
The second he crosses into the USA, a guy comes up with a gun.
Jeff: "That's what I was expecting."
Michael proved anything is possible in America. Where else can a poor black boy grow up to be a rich white woman?
And together we will make America great again.
You were never great in the first place.
Trump really fractured the US with his 1/6 insurrection...
Abortion is beautiful.
Biden did 9/10.
What is the American virus? Diabetes.
Your dad went on America's Got Talent for "smoothest way to leave their child."
Your hairline looks like the inflation in America.
Germany does a backflip. America: What is happening?
France: Want a baguette?
USSR: Help!
What do you call somebody in America that is smart?
An immigrant.
Why is it easy to defeat America in Clash of Clans?
Because they have already got 2 towers down.
Why did America lose the chess match?
They were down 2 towers.
What kind of shoes do kidnappers wear?
White vans.