Aircraft jokes
What did the bomber say to the jet?
"Sorry bro, I gotta bomb."
*WAIT NO-*
A Japanese, Hispanic, and Iraqi man are in a plane. The Japanese man drops a bowl off of it and shouts "I love my country!" Then the Hispanic man drops a burrito off the side and shouts, "I love my country!" Finally, the Iraqi man drops a bomb and shouts, "I love my country!"
Not much longer on, a man walks by a boy who is sitting by a crater laughing non-stop. And the man asks, "What's so funny?" And the boy says "When I farted, my house blew up!"
Why did the 767 fly into the towers?
Because a310 dared it to.
Helicopters fly because they are so ugly that the ground pushes them away.
Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.
Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.
Helicopters...
What do you call a woman in a fighter jet to the right of the president?
An escort.
Everything disappears in the Bermuda Triangle.
Except my depression.
Bro, Kobe Bryant is singing with the basketball team in his helicopter, celebrating right now, I bet.
Oh wait, I forgot.
What happens when a computer thinks it knows better than a human?
Ask Boeing.
What is the difference between a banana and a helicopter? Neither of them is a police officer.
It’s a bird.
It’s a plane.
Oh, shit it is a plane!
A Russian wife turned to her husband and asked...
"What's this special military operation our glorious leader keeps talking about?"
Her husband replied, "It's a proxy war between Russia and NATO."
"Oh, right. How's it going?"
"Well," he replied, "so far we've lost 200,000 soldiers, 4,000 tanks, 500 aircraft, numerous helicopters, loads of armoured vehicles and artillery pieces along with our 'flag ship'."
"Wow! What about NATO?"
"They haven't turned up yet."
What's the difference between MH370 and my dad?
Both disappeared, but one killed 239 people.
"Hey, look, that plane is getting bigge-"
The plane said to the tower, "You're so cute, I want to come crashing into your arms!"
What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.
You know why they call her Wonder Woman?
She's always wondering where she parked her invisible jet.
I heard that the Twin Towers have some plane DNA.
I made this one up myself just now.
Stephen Hawking would be a good pilot because the aircraft would be the first to take off and land in autopilot.
The two brothers were sitting next to each other. They played with planes all day long. They got too violent, and now their sister (World Trade Center) stands there. The brothers were put up for adoption, and the planes were given back to their owners.