Agriculture jokes
As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To poo in the toilet.
What do pimps and farmers have in common?
They both need a hoe to stay in business.
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.
Two cows in a field.
One says to the other, "Mooooooo!"
The other says, "Tut, I was gonna say that!"
Did you hear about the boy who sat under a cow?
He got a pat on the head.
Why did the Scarecrow get a promotion?
Because it was OUTSTANDING in the field! 💀💀😂😂😂😂😂
Q: What do you call a nosy pepper?
A: Jalapeño business!
What’s the difference between a cow and 9/11?
A cow can’t be milked for 21 years.
In fields of gold, where sunshine beams, Monkeys swing and play, it's their dreams. Their fur so soft, their eyes so bright, Picking cotton with delight.
Their little hands so quick and neat, Plucking the cotton, can't be beat. They chatter and laugh, they dance and play, In the fields all day, they'll stay.
Their tails so long, their ears so big, They're quite the sight, it's quite a gig. They're busy as can be, you see, In the fields of cotton, they're free.
So let us marvel at these little thieves, In the fields of gold, they give and receive. Their antics bring us joy and delight, In the fields of cotton, they're always right.
Why was the calf afraid?
Because she was a cow-herd.
Why do cows have hooves?
Because they lactose!
How does white people's backyard look like? Cotton field!
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples actually get picked.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef! (aka dinner)
Why did the chicken cross the road why? Because they wanted to kick someone in the family.
Why don't chickens and sheep get along?
Because they have beef between them.
Why did the cow cross the road? To go to the moooooovies! Nyahahahahahahahahaha!
What do you call a cow that no one likes? The mooser.
What did the grape say when he got squished? Nothing, he just let out a little wine.