Agriculture jokes
What's the difference between cotton and an orphan?
One gets picked.
What do you call a cow that fell up the stairs?
Ground beef.
Why did ze cow cross the road?
yo watch his mum getting butchered she was an udder failure.
Q: What do you call a shed full of black fellas?
A: Retired Farming Machinery.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple? Apples get picked.
Two cows are standing in a field.
Cow 1: Did you hear about the outbreak of mad cow disease?
Cow 2: Good thing I'm a helicopter.
Why did the baby cow cross the road?
To find its mom who has the milk.
"You're fat as a cow."
"......."
"Nope."
What do orphans and apples not have in common? Apples get picked.
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, "Have you heard about the mad cow disease that's going around?"
"Yeah," the other cow says. "Makes me glad I'm a penguin."
What did the potato say when the sweet potato told it to hurry?
I yam.
There were 5 cows on a farm, one mom and 4 calves.
The first calf goes up to the mom and says, "Momma, why is my name Rose?"
The mother cow replies, "Well sweetie, when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head."
The second calf walks up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Lily?", to which the mom replies "Well honey, when you were born, a single lily petal fell on your head."
The third calf walks up, but before it can get a word out, the fourth calf screams at the top of its lungs. The mother cow yells, "Shut up, Cinderblock!"
How do you f**k a sheep?
Put your d**k in it and face it off the cliff edge. It'll keep going backwards as you push forwards.
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
We were at a restaurant today, and my dad was talking about a place called Sea Ranch.
I asked, "What do they raise there? Sea horses?"
What do you call a male cow that snores?
A “Bull Dozer”.
A cow was standing in a corn field. The chicken walked by and said annoyingly, "What do I see here? Corned beef!?"
Yo mama so fat, cow!
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because.
What do you call someone who takes care of chickens?
A chicken tender.