Agriculture jokes
Why did the rapper become a gardener?
Because he wanted to drop some FRESH SEEDS.
Beans
The only time that cows will make noise is when they are in the moooo-d.
What is a popular name for girl peanuts?
Michelle.
What do you call a cow who's personality is down to Earth?
Ground beef.
Why did the pig decline to go to the farmer's house?
He would take him to a "pignic."
Q: What do you call a shed full of black fellas?
A: Retired Farming Machinery.
What did the cow say when it saw the farmer twice in one day?
"Deja moo!"
What do you call a retarded cow?
Vegan (vegetable).
What do you call someone who takes care of chickens?
A chicken tender.
Normal Europe: Oh no, I lost my iPhone!
Amish: Oh no, I lost my potato!
What's the difference between an orphan and a bowl of apples?
The apples got picked!
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples actually get picked.
What's the difference between orphans and apples?
Apples get picked.
What did the cow say when he lost his tractor?
"Where's my tractor?"
Cow jokes are udder-culous (ridiculous)!
Two old Indian ladies out picking potatoes, one lady stops, staring at this huge potato, turning it round and round.
The other old lady says to her, "What are you doing?" She says, "These potatoes remind me of my husband's nuts."
She says, "Oh my, are they really that big?" She said, "No, they're that dirty. lololol"
What unit of measurement is used on farms? Barn yards.
What happens when you cross a cow and a redneck?
The redneck fucks the cow.
What's the hardest part when making skimmed milk?
Throwing the cow across the lake.