Aed jokes
What does a dick and an elderly person have in common? They are both short.
Hey! This site has a home page, but I wonder if the orphans can see it.
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome who plays basketball?
Dribble.
You learn something new every day.
Like the people in 9/11 are the world's fastest readers; they went through 100s in under a second.
Me and my cancer
Are like a game of Fortnite.
I’ll never win.
I'M ON A SEAFOOD DIET.I SEE FOOD AND I EAT IT!!.
It's a RUF life in Africa.
What do you call a stupid pig? A pious.
Kid: Hey, Dad.
Dad: You're an hour late.
Kid: No, it was two hours. Also, I was working on math.
Dad: By yourself?
Kid: No.
Dad: A boy?
Kid: I was with the teacher.
Rot in hell?
More like nasty-ass thot in a well.
I got arrested because I cremated a guy. They said the guy had been alive when I burned him. I mean, it's an early cremation—what's the difference?
Who needs storage on a computer? Just use an Asian's brain.
What do you call a gay guy eating Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
Q: What does a cat have that no other animal has?
A: Kittens.
What do a convention of nerds and Kurt Cobain's garage have in common?
There's brains all over the place.
If you spin a fidget spinner, You'll end up spinning it too fast. When you end up spinning it too fast, it will make you fly away. When you fly away, you'll end up in a tree. When you end up in a tree, you'll see that your friends are hanging out without you. When you see that your friends are hanging out without you, you'll run away in the woods because you're sad. When you ran away in the woods, you'll see a bear. When you see a bear, it will chase you. When the bear chases you, you'll build a fort to protect yourself. When you build a fort to protect yourself, you then notice you're lonely. You'll become friends with the bear. When you become friends with a bear, you'll start to act like a bear. When you start to act like a bear, you will become a bear.
DO NOT BECOME A BEAR! NEVER PLAY WITH A FIDGET SPINNER!
What do you call an autistic kid going down the stairs in a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels!
Whenever a woman files a rape accusation, it’s obviously fake. Even the cows at my farm are more likely, at least they aren’t flat.
POV: me telling a joke.
My dad: nobody likes a smart-ass.
Me: Nobody likes a smart-ass until the smart-ass finds a cure for cancer.
A blond-haired girl, a brown-haired girl, and a ginger-haired girl were out walking when they came across some tracks.
The brown-haired girl looked at them and said, "I think they are elephant tracks."
Then the ginger-haired girl looked at the tracks and said, "No way, they are definitely duck tracks."
Finally, the blond-haired girl bent down to examine the tracks when she got hit by the train.
John took a bath with bubbles.
Bubbles was a man.