Aed jokes
What do you call 10,000 lawyers at the bottom of the sea?
A good start :)
I asked a man for ten dollars for a cup of coffee. The man said coffee was only a quarter. I told him I was putting all my begs in one ask-it.
Once my cat was playing video games. I was OVERWATCHing him.
I asked him to PAWS the game. He then hissed at me. I was surprised; he usually has a good PURRsonality. He said he YARNED to play the game.
What's a car's favorite place to hang out?
A CARnival!
Stephen Hawking went on a date last night.
She left after 15 minutes, complaining she didn't like his tone.
ohio lol
A man from Brooklyn is arguing with an Englishman. He says things like,
"It's an elevator, not a lift!"
and
"It's a bathroom! Not 'washroom'!"
He keeps going on until the Englishman says,
"Hey wanker, it's a school, not a god damned shooting range."
Q: What's the difference between a folk singer and a 14" pizza?
A: The pizza can support a family of four.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
Because he doesn’t know where home is.
My boyfriend is just like a sexy nerd and I still have to ask him things like that because I'm so distracted from him.
Me: God, Bryce, do we really have to talk about this again?
Bryce: What?
Me: You're still talking shit!! I already told you! It's 9 inches! Stop saying it's 3!
P.S. I'm a girl.
Q: Why did the baby cross the road?
A: It wasn't in its car seat.
What did the math acorn say when it grew up?
"Gee-I'm-a-tree."
Samuel liked Batman when he was a kid.
He still is a kid.
An alien goes to Area 51, but I wonder why he doesn't go to your house?
A kid just becomes an orphan, well, I guess it's better than being a hobo.
I heard there is a zozo hobo who eats all your Pringles.
Zozo went to the store and walked out with nothing, why?
Zozo the hobo is a hobo, remember? He doesn’t have any money.
An orphan went up to Nikola Tesla and asked to travel in time. He then saw his parents put him in a building, saying, "You now live here!"
Hi 👋 I love 💕 you know I do. What a good night of a good [something].
Fact: If you jump off a 12-story building, you will not like the result.
A police officer pulls a man over. "Hands in the air!"
The man said, "Okay."