Aed jokes
I once had a cat that reminded me of Doug Ford.
Fat, mean, and probably inbred.
Have a good day tomorrow!
What is a kid who loves school?
A smart kid.
What is the difference between a tree and a school?
A school is for kids, and a tree is for birds.
What does a Chinese machine gun sound like? "ching chong ching chong tang tang."
What is a monkey’s 🐒 favorite dance move?
The banana 🍌 split.
org.springframework.beans.factory.BeanCreationException: Error creating a bean with name X.
What did the tree say to his sister? Wood you please leaf me alone, you son of a birch?
I have a brother and he told me this quote, "No wonder they had a second child, they messed up on the first one." He’s the second child... I’m the first...
Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line, he comes across a woman who isn't saluting.
"Why are you not saluting like the others?" Hitler barks.
"Mein Führer, I'm the nurse," she responds. "I'm not crazy!"
A poster for the winter relief fund reads: "No one should be allowed to go hungry or suffer from the cold." A worker says to his friend, "Now were not even allowed to do that."
Hi 👋 I love 💕 you know I do. What a good night of a good [something].
What is a nut that does magic?
A human that can turn into a nut!
What do painters and prostitutes have in common?
They're both paid for a good finish.
Why is Sunday better than Monday?
Because Monday is a weak day.
One day, a chemistry teacher asked his student, whose name is Raj, "What is the chemical formula of water?"
The Raj replied, "HIJKLMNO."
The teacher asked, "What is this rubbish?"
The Raj replied, "Yesterday, you taught the chemical formula of water is H2O."
What do you call a sandwich 🥪 full of envy?
Peanut Butter n' Jealousy! 😂
If you spin a fidget spinner, You'll end up spinning it too fast. When you end up spinning it too fast, it will make you fly away. When you fly away, you'll end up in a tree. When you end up in a tree, you'll see that your friends are hanging out without you. When you see that your friends are hanging out without you, you'll run away in the woods because you're sad. When you ran away in the woods, you'll see a bear. When you see a bear, it will chase you. When the bear chases you, you'll build a fort to protect yourself. When you build a fort to protect yourself, you then notice you're lonely. You'll become friends with the bear. When you become friends with a bear, you'll start to act like a bear. When you start to act like a bear, you will become a bear.
DO NOT BECOME A BEAR! NEVER PLAY WITH A FIDGET SPINNER!
What sound does a nut make when it comes alive?
Christmas!
What is a mouse's favorite movie?
"Sharpay's Fabu-mouse Adventure!"