I'm not going to bungee jump. I was born because of broken rubber and I'm not gonna die the same way.
I fell from the stairs the other day. It really "got me down."
Why did Billy drop his ice cream, He got hit by a bus.
I had a friend who was a deep sleeper. One day, a fire started in his house. Now he's a really deep sleeper.
I accidentally drank a little food coloring last night. I ended up dying inside.
My dog was hungry, so I let him loose outside while I filled his bowl. I found out later that he was run over by a truck. It seemed to really hit the Spot
Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
There was a guy who got his entire left side cut off. Don’t worry, he is all right now.
Humpty Dumpty felled off the wall, his mom did a terri-fried call. He got hurt in a egg-cident & it never got eggs-elent. When the eggs-plant was over, he got told to use the mower. It happened too fast, he watched the very last. Next he died, eaten all fried.
What's worse than throwing a baby off a cliff?
Catching it with a pitchfork.
How did the hipster drown?
He ice-skated before it was cool.
why were you born? because I asked out your mom on accident
How do you spell racecar backwards?
racecar
How do you spell racecar sideways?
Paul Walker's death.
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
Because she didn't have any arms.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Susie.
He died because of a fuck up by the Hospital, apparently the doctor said to the nurse you can discharge Mr Hawking now, so she went to his room and pulled the plug out of his computer.
Stephen Hawkins died crossing the road, he was hit by a Universal Serial Bus.
Did you hear how Steven Hawkins Died? There was a mix up and he was dropped at pc world instead of A&E!
Stephen Hawking's death was purely accidental. He clicked “shut-down” instead of “sleep”.
Why did sally run into a tree? She is blind
I accidentally walked on the Lego Batman mask.
I want my fucking feet back!
