A twin engine has two engines.
If one engine stops, the other will have just enough power to get the plane to the scene of the accident.
What is long, yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of children.
My friend Amir didn’t have the greatest driving record because of all the car crashes he got in. He only crashed his plane once in a building, so he had a much better flying record.
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N. Oh my gosh, I'm peeing on my shoe, no one knows about it yet!
Helen Keller walked into a bar, and a table, and chairs.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because someone booted her in the face. 🤣🤣
Person: I broke my arm in three places.
Doctor: Well, don't go to those three places then.
What do you call a toddler lying in the middle of the road? Speed bump.
Looks like he got stuck in a sticky situation.
Who's climbing the tree?..... Not Sarah.
Who is in hospital?.... Sarah.
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Susie.
I will always remember my grandpa's last words. "Shit, the ladder is falling!"
I asked my sister to get me a cup of fruit punch. I realized she was taking a bit so I walk to the kitchen and noticed that she spilled it on herself. I asked her, "How did you do that?" but there was no response.
What did Homer Simpson say when he ran over a deer? "DOE!"
I have a daughter; she’s a fan. Her name is Penny. Fan she was born on the mountain Pen y Fan. I adopted her because her mum fell off the cliff after birthing Penny. It doesn’t matter, really; Penny’s mum wasn’t a big fan of her anyway.
Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory?
Many soles were lost.
Why did Stephen Hawking die? ... Because he pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep."
I was watching my boyfriend's dog while he took a shower. I started playing fetch with him when the ball went over the balcony. He went to get it and fell 10 stories. When I looked down, he appeared to be dead.
My boyfriend loved his dog and I didn't know what to do, so feeling awful, I sat on the couch and waited for him to come back. About three minutes later he got out of the shower. He ordered some food and went to the table to eat when I said, "You know, your dog's been a little depressed lately..."
Where did Sally go when the explosion happened?
Everywhere!
When I try to eat, but I hurt my feet. When I using a hoe, but I hurt my toe. When I going to a doctor, but then I get trolled. Oh I just, want to say, what the flip?!!
When I using a copper, but I enveloped by a hopper. When I trying to draw someone, but it ended up with a punishment. When I spit on a bunny, it jumps right on me. Oh I just, want to say, what the flip?!!
When I growing older, someone called me a slacker. When I was 33, I bumped into a tree. When I getting angry, people calls me crazy lady. Oh I just, want to say, what the flip?!!
