Acceptance Jokes

Na, don't be mean to fat people. Oh wait, never mind, they can handle the weight.

Yo mom's so old, she was happily accepted into the museum.

what did Germany and Austria do after ww2?

accepted all art students

Why does a straight guy act gay? Because he wants to feel wanted and wants to be BFFs with the hottest girls.

Morbid jokes are just like girlfriends. Not everyone gets it.

Yay

The image displays the text "Love is Love" with three categories: "Not Race", "Not Age", and "Not Religion". Each category is depicted with stick figures showing different skin colors, ages (10 and 36), and religions (Christian and Jewish). Below, a close-up of the age depiction is shown and at the very bottom is an image of a fish character with a disgusted look.

Me: Want to hear a joke?

Friend: Sure.

Me: When my Mum and Dad said they loved me.

Friend: What's funny about that?

Me: Because the next day they disowned me.

Children are like farts.

You can only tolerate your own.

Man: "I know how to please a woman." Woman: "Then please leave me alone."

Man: "I want to give myself to you." Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man: "Your hair color is fabulous." Woman: "Thank you. It's on aisle three at the corner drug store."

Man: "You look like a dream." Woman: "Go back to sleep."

Man: "I can tell that you want me." Woman: "Yes, I want you to leave."

Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?" Woman: "Do not enter. -OR- Stop."

Man: "Your body is like a temple." Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."

Man: "Is this seat empty?" Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

Man: "What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar?" Woman: "I hate you."

Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?" Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

In History class, the teacher taught a lesson about serial killer Albert Fish. Back in the early 20th century, Fish reportedly kidnapped, ate, and raped over 100 kids. He mainly chose victims who were either retarded or black. Further on the lesson, the teacher explained how in those days, black people were socially not equal with white people, and how people with mental illness were not accepted and treated properly due to a lack of knowledge of mental health.

One of the students raised their hand and said, “You ought to be arrested.” The teacher confusedly asked, “Why?” The student explained, “Because you’re thinking like Albert Fish.”

Straight people ask why gays have such a good fashion sense.

They have to come out of the closet sometime.

What song do supportive parents of a closeted child love?

“The Son Will Come Out Tomorrow.”

My crush rejected me 2 years ago, and I still have never moved on. I'll be over her when a train is over me.

There once was a man that wanted to join a group of right-handed men, but he wrote with the other hand. He got left behind.

My friend wasn't open to the idea of me becoming a nudist.

I told him to stop being so clothes-minded.

Why did God create gay men? So fat girls could dance.

How do you get your appeal for rape charges accepted? Say you were expressing your desire for a woman, which is protected under the Constitution in freedom of expression.