Worst Jokes Ever

What do Boy Scouts and IG models have in common?

They both be fucking sugar daddies.

What is the difference between a cow and 9/11?

You can’t milk a cow for 15 years.

What does the long distance call and a Black person have in common?

They both don’t work.

If you hate what you hear from Nickelback, at least you can get your nickel back.

If you have to deal with the noise from Deftones... unfortunately, not only are you unable to obtain any refund, but you may have become permanently deaf.

Why can’t you take a Black Asian guy golfing? Because he can’t drive and can’t find his own balls.

A Thai woman ran into a wall. What does she break?

Her boner.

Bill Clinton and Joe Biden are on a sinking ship.

Joe Biden says we need to save the women and children. Bill Clinton says, "Screw the women and children." Joe Biden says, "Do we have that much time?"

I got a part in a movie called "Cocaine." I only have one line.

What’s the difference between video games and my dad?

My dad doesn’t beat me.

I'm so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.

I have some jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.

When your baby is stillborn and you have a funeral, what song should you never play?

Alphaville - "Forever Young."

Na, don't be mean to fat people. Oh wait, never mind, they can handle the weight.

Your dad is so fat that when he walks past the TV, I miss three episodes of South Park.

Why was Santa happy?

'Cause he has hoes.

What is the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?

Usain Bolt can finish a race.

Scientists make skyscrapers and airplanes.

Religion crashes them.

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common.

They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.

What do you call a basketball player with erectile dysfunction?

Tragic Johnson.

I saw two guys wearing matching clothing, and I asked if they were gay. They quickly arrested me.