I asked my mom if I can help her out with the cooking, she answered yes.
A few hours later, dinner was ready and dad came to join. Mother said, "Honey, can you get the mashed potatoes?" Dad said, "Why, sheโs right here."
Worst Jokes Ever
Your hairline goes so far back it went back to when Earth was created.
Your mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind.
If two vegans are arguing, is it still considered beef?
I dare you to smile like a donut. Did you do it?
What's the natural cure to an old man's inability to forgive people?
Alzheimer's.
What is the most noise that comes out of a ladies mouth? Nothing because they never have anything important to say.
If you hit an Indian person on the forehead with a dart, is it considered a bullseye?
Why can't orphans walk through doors?
Because they don't have a house to walk into.
I have some black friends who hate it when I say the N-word around them, so I got a pet monkey.
What was the weather forecast when the planes hit the World Trade Center? Partly cloudy with scattered passengers!
How do you get a monkey off the wall?
You jerk him off!
What's the similarities between anonymous and a cow? I think you know...
Yes, sir.
Four big guys and they grab on my thighs. Blow up my guts like the 4th of July. If they keep fuckin' my butt then I might just cry. Poop and semen sprayin' on my eyes.
He lick my dick and the cum start sprayin'. Charging up my dick I'ma go super saiyan. When he cum the fuckin' booty I don't do much playing. Then I whispered in his ear, like hey are you stayin'? He said yeah I'm not leavin'.
I guess he George Floyd, cause always leavin'. Not breathin' he chew on my dick like a baby. That's teathin' I'm fuckin' a nigga I think it's named Steven. Hawkin' f*ck him 'til he ain't walkin', dick stone-cold call him BBC. Austin It's a booty massacre when I visit him in Boston. Bought him new titties I don't care what they costin'.
Bitch, hop on the dick do a split. Shout out Lil Baby. My dick is as real as it gets, I'm not fuckin' on him if he don't have tits. I'm catchin' his balls like my name Kyle Bitz.
There's four Big guys, they're grabin' on my thighs. They blow my guts like the 4th of July. If he keep fuckin' my butt then I might cry. There's poop and semen sprayin' on my eyes.
Yes sir, that is a fact tho, take out my dick slip it in his asshole. Swinging my dick through the air like a lasso. Painted his face like Apollo Pocasso (ugh). But I'm not a very good artist, f*ck 'em all good 'til that. Nigga farted planted my seeds in his ass like a garden. The way I play with balls, you should call me James Harden.
Yeah, DigBar is elite, there's four big guys and I'm takin' their meat. I eat the boy's butt, Then I chase him with skeet. And I charge for booty, I promise DigBar Isn't cheap. And I count dudes when I sleep, not sheep, get up in my sheets. And I'm beatin' on my meat.
Bitch. We got four big guys and they grab on my thighs. And they gon' bust on my eyes.
Does a midget count as an orphan?
A Japanese man goes to the dentist. After being there for a while, the dentist asks, "How often do you floss your teeth?"
The Jap said, "After every meal." When they finish up, the dentist turns to him and says, "You need to floss your eyes more. I can still see them."
My priest asked if anyone had any questions or anything interesting they wanted to say.
So I raised my hand, he said why donโt you tell everyone what you have to say.
In front of the whole church I said I did not know Jesus Christ was the first scarecrow.
The north and south towers got into an argument.
The south tower said, "We will talk about this when we are on the ground."
Bleach!
No one has the right to look down on others unless you're perfect, and looking down on others is not perfect either.
It's just true.
