Worst Jokes Ever
Yesterday during the storm, there was a blackout, so I shot him.
My girlfriend told me her lips were dry, and she had the audacity to get mad at me for telling her to walk.
If Kamala Harris is Indian, why doesn’t she have that dot on her head?
So she claims to be.
And the only black color I know is when you shut off the lights.
What is better to have, autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?
Did you hear about the guy who was arrested for stealing luggage? Unfortunately, he lost his case.
Why were the UK and the USA bad at chess?
Because they lost their queen and two towers.
I like my women how I like my scotch: 11 years old and mixed with Coke.
Yesterday, there was a blackout on my street.
So I sold them.
Why are there no pharmacies in Africa?
Because you can’t take medicine on an empty stomach.
What’s the difference between jelly and jam?
You can’t “jelly” it in her ass.
What do you do to a deaf girl after you’re done fucking her?
Break her fingers so she can’t tell anyone.
Emma Watson gets hotter and hotter in the Harry Potter movies when you’re watching in reverse order.
One time a blind person grabbed my arm thinking it was something else.
"Oh wow, this is such an interesting book!"
What do you call it when a gay guy eats Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
Yo mama so ugly, when I put her next to a naked mole rat, it said "bluetooth connected."
Two Italian men get on a bus.
They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. They speak with an Italian accent.
The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:
"Emma come first.
Den I come.
Den two asses come together.
I come once-a-more.
Two asses, they come together again.
I come again and pee twice.
Then I come one lasta time."
"You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!"
"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."
Woman: I want a man who is 6 feet and 6 inches.
Man: Is 6 feet and 6 inches one thing or two?
Woman: Two, I want a man who is 6 feet and also is 6 inches.
Man: Shit!
There are 4 billion women on earth. Why isn't it clean yet?
What is the difference between Nicole Brown Simpson and cancer?
OJ couldn’t kill cancer.
What do you call an autistic kid in a school shooting?
Target practice.