Worst Jokes Ever
Yo mama so fat when she steps on the scale it says, "We want your weight not your phone number."
What do you call a blind German?
A Nazi (not see).
If Will Smith could be in any movie, he would be in "Find My Hairline."
I bought my fat wheelchair son a treadmill for his birthday, then that big brainless special motherfucker cried over it and threw a fit cuz his fat special ass couldn't get up out of his wheelchair and said for Jesus to raise him up and give him working and movable legs.
I'd make a 9/11 joke, but it wouldn't fly anymore.
And if I tried it, it would probably crash and burn.
It just wouldn't help my comedy career take off.
Q: What do gay horses say?
A: "Geigh!"
What did the tree do when the bank closed?
It started its own branch.
If a tree could be any animal, what would it be?
Answer: A dog because of its bark lol. đ
I used to be a baker, but I decided to quit my job and stick my dough inside WOMENâS bakeries.
I'm reading a book on anti-gravity, it's impossible to PUT DOWN!
What happens when you eat a cat?
I love to eat cats for dinner!
"Demon Slayer" is yay, and who's your favorite in "Demon Slayer"?
Hi, I am Emma. I'm going to Stan.
Doctor: "I'm sorry, but you suffer from a terminal illness and only have 10 to live."
Patient: "What do you mean 10? 10 what? months? weeks?"
Doctor: "9, 8, 7..."
A buddy and I checked out some books from a local library. When we returned them, he said, "Your sister works the returns, right?" I told him, "Yes, she does, and she will be here in about five minutes." He said, "Why donât we put a cookbook in the womenâs sports section?" I told him, "I love it!" So I picked out a Reese Witherspoon book.
Why was six afraid of seven?
Because seven eight nine.
I was walking down the street and I punched a white guy and then I was arrested for assault.
The next day after I got out, I punched a black guy and I was arrested for impersonating a police officer.
If you're reading this, you are Nickel and Gallium......
Ni- ........*something else in between the two halves*................Ga
YOU FUCKING MONKEYS!
"Sigma" - By every boy in my class.
Life is like a penis: women make it hard for no reason.