Worst Jokes Ever
Happy new year! 🥳
Why are tomatoes 🍅 the slowest vegetable?
Because they can’t ketchup.
What is a bus ride that is dumb? A boring one.
The bible says to love your neighbors as you love yourself.
So I treat everyone like garbage.
Why does Hitler drink milk? Because he doesn't like juice.
Last night I burned down an orphanage.
There was one survivor who said I would regret it. I said, "What are you gonna do, tell your parents?"
Why did the strawberry 🍓 go out with a banana? Because it could not find a date.
What do you call a kid with cancer walking through the airport?
•Terminal
Better call NASA and tell them there are only going to be 7 planets after I destroy URANUS.
I like my Oreos how I like my victims... Drowning.
Why is Mrs. Grapes 🍇 a good mother?
Because she loves raisin' kids.
You could say Japanese car fans and ancient Egyptians are alike—they both worship Datsun.
The quiet kid starts playing "Pumped Up Kicks" in the parking lot before school.
I started beating my washing machine because it wasn't working, my wife started crying.
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be saying, "ten babies in one trashcan." Morbid humor would be saying, "one baby in ten trashcans."
Did you know the pool in the Titanic is still full?
What's yellow and can't swim?
A school bus full of disabled children.
Why is Helen Keller's child blind too? She always fed it with a fork!
If I place a slide on the edge of a cliff or a really high building, would going down it be considered "suislide"?
Asking for a friend.
What animal do you always find at a baseball game? A bat.