Worst Jokes Ever
A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend.
Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no, the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, "The sharks are not even bothering him!" And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."
How do people in Alabama get circumcised? You knee your sister's jaw...
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To find his family. Sorry!
If you ever get bored, just hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
How did I get to Iraq? I ran.
What’s one thing that a gay person is scared of?
A gay guy that’s straight!
Q: How many more chemo treatments did the cancer patient need?
A: Tumor.
What do you call a sad coffee?
Despesso.
A cop pulled me over and shouted, "Papers!" I shouted, "Scissors!" and drove off.
Why did Sally get a black eye? Because she decided to play football.
Why do orphans get the small sized chip bags?
Because they don’t have a family to share it with. 😥
Don't touch my pickles - they are very picklish.
Is it bad to hit an orphan?
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Well... I mean, they could go to church and try to gather that someone hit them.
What do you call a laughing motorcycle?
A Yamahahahaha!
What did Sally get for her 18th birthday? A brick.
Why did she get a brick? She hit 18.
"Knock, knock?"
"Who's there?"
"Cow said."
"Cow said who?"
"Cow says moo you ding dong!"
Why did Stephen Hawking walk across the road? Oh wait...
I would tell you a pizza joke, but it's too cheesy.
Why did the bike fall over? Because I was too tired.
Why do orphans go to church?
Because it's the only place where they get to call him "father."