Worst Jokes Ever
I was setting a voice recognition password for my new phone, and a dog nearby barked and ran away. Now I'm still looking for that dog to unlock my phone.
I say hi to Sans. Sans shows his hand and says, "It's hand to meet you," and we both laugh.
I was hitting my hand, and my mom asked me what I was doing. I said I'm beating my meat.
The other day someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.
Tell all the skeleton jokes you want, but I've got thick skin.
How are babies and the elderly similar?
They are both fun to throw out of moving cars.
My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.
Ur mum smells like shit, yeah, so she sucks a man off and washing machine. Yo, don’t at me, yeah, you chicken breath.
Your mama so old, her first Christmas was the first Christmas!
Santa was in my social studies book. He was a redcoat.
Don't flirt when there is Life Alert!
Edna: Hey there big boy!
Big boy: You need to stop doing this.
Oh no!
Why was the baby ant confused?
Because its uncles were all aunts!
Fucking Fruit!
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan? Because it doesn't have a home button.
Where did Johnny go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
This is so damn funny!
My mom said to let Jesus come inside me; now I can't sit down.
A neighbor went up to me and asked me where my parents were. When I said, "In the bed," my neighbor said, "Oooooohh, how long is the penis?" I said, "Wait here," and I interrupted my parents while they were doing some "business" and asked my dad the exact question he said. Then he spanked me.
There was this guy going to a bar. The guy asks for a drink. The bartender says, "I'll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta-joke."
So the guy replies,
OK. There was this guy going to a bar. The guy asks for a drink. The bartender says, "I'll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta-joke."
So the guy replies,
OK. There was this guy going to a bar. The guy asks for a drink. The bartender replies, "Here you go!"
So he gives the guy a drink. So he gives the guy a drink. So he gives the guy a drink.