Worst Jokes Ever
Trump and two of his friends are stranded on an island with no internet connection and no way of getting home. As they frantically run around the island trying to get a signal so Trump can call his private helicopter to come and pick them up, Trump’s wig falls off and lands on a magical lamp, from which suddenly appears a genie. As Trump replaces his wig, the genie announces that he will grant each man one wish for freeing him.
The men stop to confer. The first one says he will wish for a plane to rescue him, the second wishes for a boat to rescue him and they tell Trump to wish for a helicopter to rescue him. Trump, being Trump, nods and says yes, but he wasn’t really listening. Then they approach the genie. The first one of Trump’s friends wishes for a plane to rescue him, as agreed. The second one of Trump’s friends wishes for a boat to rescue him, as agreed. Then Trump is left all alone, but instead of wishing for a helicopter to rescue him, as agreed, he says, “Aww, I’m lonely now. I wish both my friends were here with me!”
Why wasn’t the moon hungry?
Because it was full!
What's the sun's favorite chocolate? Mars bar.
What did the sweet potato say to the potato when he was told to hurry?
I yam.
pop pop meow?
You're so ugly, even Smara gets jealous.
Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.
What's the difference between a midget and a tall person? Only one of them can ride the rides.
Someone: Hey, are you a skeleton?
A skeleton: Of course, I have a SKELE-ton of fans!
Koalas are weird. Why? I don't know!
What do you call a scared octopus?
An octopussy.
What’s the similarity between a bag of chips and a gun?
When you pull one out in class, everybody wants to be your friend.
A man once sued smart water for not making him smart. Then a woman replied, “Okay cool, now I’m going to go sue Thin Mints for not making me thin.”
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They can’t find home.
What is a good night? Sleep tight, I have four.
I did have a good night and I did a good night and I had fun.
What is the difference between a tree house for dinner, and dinner with you today after school?
Ya nan does gymnastics with her boyfriends.
I love still things.
Good day tomorrow, and what day are they still good today? Good time. Love day! A great night time and...