Worst Jokes Ever
What movie do orphans hate most?
"Home Alone."
I will tell you a joke--your life.
Why don’t Belgians eat shit sandwiches?
They don’t fancy bread!
I named my dog "J," and everyone thought I said "jam."
I wish my lawn was emo. Then it would cut itself.
What is the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can't tuna fish.
Orphan: "I want to be a superhero."
Me: "You should be Batman."
Also me: *starts laughing* because Batman doesn't have parents...
What do a blackjack dealer and my uncle have in common?
They both hit me face down on the table.
I was in the bank one day, and this old lady asked me to check her balance. So I pushed her over.
A wild Iceberg appears! Titanic uses ram! It is not very effective. (Titanic sinks.)
KFC doesn’t use toilet paper because it is finger lickin' good!
What do bubbles get when they’re sick?
The suds.
Why did the cow cross the road? Because the chicken had corona.
What’s the difference between 1000 used tires and 1000 used condoms?
One's a good year and one's a great year.
What did Batman do when he went shopping?
Got ham!
What’s the worst part about eating vegetables? Putting them back in the wheelchair.
What’s black and sits on top of the stairs?
Christopher Reeves in a house fire.
"Yo mama's so fat, that I took a picture of her last Christmas, and it's still printing today!"
Mom: I was an orphan once. The kid: Oh, ok, idgaf. Mom: And you're gonna be too! :) The kid: Ok, idgaf- WAIT WHAT THE FU-
Why can’t orphans be a space ship? Because they don’t have a mothership!