Worst Jokes Ever
My mother really hates my dad for some reason. Maybe it was because he cheated on her, or maybe because it was her mom. Either way, it really ruined her birthday.
I have a problem. My dad and my girlfriend have the same birthday. So, one took my virginity, and the other is my girlfriend.
"Knock Knock"
"Who's there?"
"9/11"
"9/11 Who?"
"I thought you'd never forget..."
I once had a cat that reminded me of Doug Ford.
Fat, mean, and probably inbred.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "You know you wanna." Jill said yes and lifted her dress so they could have some fun, but stupid Jill forgot her pill and now they have a son.
What do Michael Jackson and caviar have in common? They both come on little white crackers.
What does a Chinese machine gun sound like? "ching chong ching chong tang tang."
There is a party in my mouth, and your dick is invited.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they actually come back.
Loud Korea noise.
What's an Emo's favorite drink?
Water, JK it's cyanide.
Why couldn’t the dwarf husband make his wife pregnant?
Because of his short cummings.
What is Juice WRLD's favorite restaurant?
Little Seizures.
If you spin a fidget spinner, You'll end up spinning it too fast. When you end up spinning it too fast, it will make you fly away. When you fly away, you'll end up in a tree. When you end up in a tree, you'll see that your friends are hanging out without you. When you see that your friends are hanging out without you, you'll run away in the woods because you're sad. When you ran away in the woods, you'll see a bear. When you see a bear, it will chase you. When the bear chases you, you'll build a fort to protect yourself. When you build a fort to protect yourself, you then notice you're lonely. You'll become friends with the bear. When you become friends with a bear, you'll start to act like a bear. When you start to act like a bear, you will become a bear.
DO NOT BECOME A BEAR! NEVER PLAY WITH A FIDGET SPINNER!
What did Hitler say when he was blindfolded?
I can Nazi!
Why are gay people bad at hide and seek?
Because they're always coming out of the closet.
911 what's your emergency?
Me: Officer, my girlfriend is dead!
Operator: What happened!?
Me: She bit the tip.
I can't find out where Stephen Hawking is from, I just can't place his accent.
Teacher: “Alright, we’re going to play Kahoot! Please use your real name.”
That one kid putting Joe: -_-
Teacher: Who’s Joe?
The whole class: JOE MAMA!
Roses are red, violets are blue, I thought Voldemort was ugly, but then I met you.