Worst Jokes Ever
What to say to a single guy who's insulting you: "Shut up, you horny virgin!"
You're really...
Santa Claus gave a child a bike and a football. The child wasn’t happy. Why?
He had no legs.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
Because they thought they saw their parents. (Plot twist: the orphan got ran over.)
Mom told me drugs are my enemies.
Jesus said to like your enemies.
Yay, I can like drugs then!
A man goes into Heaven and there he meets Jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says, "That is Mother Teresa’s clock, it has never moved because she has never lied."
"There is Abraham Lincoln's clock. He has lied twice so it has moved twice."
"Where is Donald Trump’s?" asks the man. Jesus answers, "It is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan."
August 3rd is the moon of earth, earth, moon, earth, universe.
Why doesn't Laila in UHS need an insult?
Have a look at her face!
I love murder shows... wish me luck cause I'm kinda hoping to be on one one day.
Who gave Jesus his birthday presents every year?
Santa Claus!
Why can’t orphans have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy."
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple? An apple gets picked.
What’s the difference between a hundred decapitated babies and a Ferrari? I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
Orphans have no home.
"F***, Jesus ate his stinky ass."
Why did Stephen Hawking go to Hell?
He couldn't get up the stairway to Heaven.
Once I got out of bed, my butt hurt afterward.
These three men wanted to start a band. One had the idea to call them the Rolling Stones, one wanted to call them the Veggies, the other said, "Let's be the Cripples," as they all rolled away.
What do you call a cow that's on the ground? Ground beef.
What do you call a Mexican that smokes weed? A baked bean.