Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

"I was walking in the yard yesterday and a bug stepped on me. Why, you ask? Because the bug didn't know I was there."

Mom: Don't forget to unload the dishwasher.

Mom: Did you finish your homework?

Mom: We are going to your grandmother's house for Thanksgiving.

Mom: Dad and I talked. We are getting a new car next month.

Son: You are?? Oh my gosh, thank you!

Mom: No, I was just making sure you were getting my texts.

Son: That was cruel!

Why do vegetarians give anonymous blowjobs at the glory hole at an adult book store? Because they don't want anybody to find out that they like meat.

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  • Teacher: What does a pig give you?

    Little Johnny: Bacon.

    Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?

    Little Johnny: Wool.

    Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?

    Little Johnny: Homework and says, "Leave, motherfucker."

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  • Oh my Prince, I've loved you ever since the day we met.

    When I was caught in your net of love, sweet love... It's all above...

    If you unironically think someone who killed themselves should have their body in jail, you are honestly such a fucking embarrassment to humanity.

    I was at a funeral and told a joke, and my sister said, "I'm dead." So I said, "That's what she said."