Worst Jokes Ever
Why can an orphan only get an iPhone X?
Because there is no home button.
Two to the one from the one to the three, I like good pussy and I like good trees, Smoke so much weed you wouldn't believe, And I get more ass than a toilet seat.
Three to the one from the one to the three, I met a bad bitch last night in the D, Let me tell you how I made her leave with me, Conversation and Hennessey.
I've been to the motherfuckin' mountain top, Heard motherfuckers talk, seen and dropped, If I ain't got a weapon I'ma pick up a rock, And when I bust yo ass I'ma continue to rock.
Getcha ass of the wall with your two left feet, It's real easy just follow the beat, Don't let that fine girl pass you by, Look real close 'cause strobe lights blind.
I didn’t eat breakfast because I’m starving myself.
How many babies does it take to paint the walls red?
Depends how hard you throw them.
Why was the stadium so hot?
Because all the fans left!
Q: Why do birds need feathers?
A: To cover their butt. Quack!
Q: Why do birds need feathers?
A: To cover up their butt quack!
Have you ever seen Helen Keller's dog?
Neither has she.
How do you punish a blind kid?
Move to a new house.
Why are half of the orphans blind? Because they can't find their parents.
How do you create the world's quickest human pyramid?
Turn on the gas chamber.
What did one mountain climber say to the other mountain climber?
Man, you are really on edge.
9: I am higher than you.
8: No, you're not!
(8 flips to his side)
What's the most confusing day of the year for an illegitimate kid?
Father's Day.
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died?
He pasta-way.
What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?
A can’t opener!
My mom wanted me to brush my hair.
And I just told her that even pet animals don't like their hair brushed...
What would you name your pet rabbit?
Harry.
What did the human say to the fly when it was buzzing around the human's head?
"Would you stop bugging me!"
What did one bee say to the other bee?
"I love you, honey!"