Why doesn't the pirate go to the strip club?
Because he has ALL of the booty!
Worst Jokes Ever
Jim: My grandpa fought in the army during World War Two. He was an officer.
Me: Cool, what rank of officer?
Jim: SS.
Me:...
My grandpa lost his toe today. 😔
Nvm, we found it. It's in his TOEtruck.
My speech impediment has gotten so worse that I stutter when typing sentences.
Me and my wife love playing table tennis. I couldn’t win all day, but when it got dark, I managed to beat her. I don’t know how the police found out so quickly.
What do you call a group of depressed teenagers? The Suicide Squad.
I go to get my mail.
Stranger: "Something fell out of your pocket! April fools!"
Me: "You're adopted, April fools!"
Then I see an orphan behind me and gets all excited.
So sad when the emo kid tried to give a high five to a tree.
Too bad he left him hanging.
Q: What is a Karen called in Europe?
A: An American.
Kile: Hey, asshole! I bet you listen to trash 50 Cent! How about you get to quarters, listen to him! My favorite rapper is the best of all! How about you go eat a cracker, you parrot nose, fuck!
Remy: I'm... y-y... YOUR DUMBER THAN ANT! I BET YOUR FAVORITE RAPPER IS A CANDY RAPPER!!
There's an upside to being an orphan; every snack they get is family size.
What gives you the power to walk through a wall?
A door.
Why can’t orphans drink? Because they don’t have any money.
My stepdad took me to work, and he told me I could climb trees.
I woke up in a hospital. Wait, did I mention that my stepdad was a lumberjack?
Why did the orphan start crying?
Because his apple found a home in his stomach.
"Creeper, aww man,"
"Today we back in the mine, got our pickaxe swinging from side to side, side, side to side."
Why do school shooters have the best shots?
They train at the best schools. 🤣🤣🧇🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"The FBI."
"The FBI who?"
"Are you dumb? It's the f#cking FBI, now open up!"
"I know, you have a lot on your plate right now."
How do you help a depressed kid face their fears... You count to 3 and say jump?
