Worst Jokes Ever
Why is sex like math?
You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal? His left shoulder.
If you are going to bully anyone, then bully an orphan, because what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What type of flower do you give an orphan?
A self-raising [flour].
Women should have the right to choose whether they want to do cooking or cleaning first.
Which dog is owned by a kid called "Charlie Brown," raps, and smokes?
Snoopy Dog.
Your hairline is so [bad] Will Smith can't slap it back in place.
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What is the difference between an orphan and a mailman?
The mailman goes home at the end of the day.
Why did the caretaker of the Twin Towers get sacked?
He left the landing lights on.
Suicide won't work, I'm already dead inside.
What’s the best cure for not wanting to go to work?
Suicide.
What is six inches, has nuts, and is hard?
A sinkers bar.
The emo tried to high five the tree, and it left him hanging.
You're sponsoring eBay with your hairline.
We should give whoever killed Hitler a statue. Oh wait, never mind.
I was at school when I remembered I forgot my necklace, then I screamed out, "Shit, I forgot Grandpa!"
Where do orphans get stuff from?
The reject shop.
Adam and Eve are going through the garden when Adam suddenly says, "What race are we?"
Eve responds with, "Ask God, he will tell you." So Adam goes over to a hill and asks, "God, what race are we?"
God says, "You are what you are."
Adam goes back to Eve and says, "We are white." Eve asks how he knew that. Adam responds with, "If we were black, he would have said 'you is what you is'."
Why do orphans hate Christmas?
Father Christmas isn’t a thing.