Worst Jokes Ever
That one depressed friend.
Ever heard of ligma? Ligma ba--
You're pretty, pretty dumb.
A man went to buy 5 undies, so he said, "Hi, 5 undies, please, 1 for each weekday." Then another man comes and said, "Hi, 7 undies please, 1 for each day, and they'll finish cleaning by Sunday." So the cashier said, "Now that's more like it!" And then another person said, "Hi, 12 undies please, wait, I'm gonna double check... January... fe"
My friend: You ever feel like life is pointless? *drives faster*
Me: Yea-
My friend: If you could die with one person, who would it be? *speeds up more*
Me: H-hey, you should slow down! Slow down, slow down! We're about to-
Why is my anus burning?
'Cause I sat on an open lighter, oh god, help!
What do orphans call family pictures?
A selfie.
What did Joe Biden say when he got pulled over?
I'm just a-Biden the law, officer.
Neither of them respect boundaries.
The man was dangling by a string!
I was jealous the day he died.
Roses are red, Violet are blue, Ur dad bought you.
How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it!
When I hotline bling, I only need one thing.
Your love life.
Why did the man get run over?
Ur mom XD
Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"
Man: *Shows a picture of his child.*
Yo mama so ugly, when she sweats, the sweat runs down the back of her head to avoid her face.
Yo mama so ugly, when she was cutting onions, the onions cried instead of her.
Why do some people hate camping?
It's in tents.
Why did the Scarecrow get a promotion?
Because it was OUTSTANDING in the field! πππππππ