911

911 jokes

9/11

Why did the people in 9/11 not call 911? Because it would call the pilots.

9 1 1

Me: Calls 9-1-1.

Operator: 9/11, what’s your emergency?

Me: *hangs up*

9/11

What’s worse than George Bush doing 9/11? Jeffrey Epstein doing nine Elevens.

Guy

A guy stole my car last night. Before dialing 911 I thought, "Fuck it. Let him explain the dead bodies in the trunk."

Gay

Osama bin laden hit the towers because he couldnt fly straight

Emergency

"911, what’s your emergency?" I asked, listening to the quiet sobs of a little kid on the other end of the line.

“I think my daddy want to kill me,” the girl said and cried, making me freeze on the spot as I recognized my daughter’s voice.

Birth

What's the difference between your birth and 9/11?

One was planned.

Victim

Can you imagine the last thing that went through the minds of 9/11 victims?

Well, probably the person in front of them.

Difference

What's the difference between 911 and a Mexican gardener?

One of them is an outside job.

Mom

The Twin Towers should've known they were gonna get hit when their mom said, "Here comes the airplane!"

Jump

"White people can't jump..."

"You must not have seen the Twin Towers on 9/11."

Cow

What is the difference between a cow and 9/11?

You can’t milk a cow for 15 years.

Sister

My sister reminds me of 911: one moan of "OMG" got everyone's attention.