Yours jokes
Your hairline is so long that your mother could not brush your hair.
What makes a nuke and divorce the same?
It only takes one of each to end your life.
Your mom is so fat, she can't make it through the door.
One day a boy asks his grandfather for some money, and the grandpa says, “Well, can your dick touch your asshole?” To which the boy replied, “No.” So the grandpa says, “Okay,” and leaves it at that and walks off.
A few years later, the boy asks his grandfather for some money again, and his grandfather once again asks, “Can your dick touch your asshole?” To which the boy proudly says, “Yes, it can.” To which the grandpa says, “Good, now go fuck yourself.”
Me: "Comment if you love yourself and give me a reason."
Friends: comments give reason.
Me: "Notice how I commented nothing."
Day later:
Mom: Let me see your TikTok.
Me: Shows her the video.
Mom: calls suicide.
JK, she just beat me for posting a video on her.
What can you do if you can't bear sharing the same blood as your father who raped you?
Have a blood transfusion.
Your forehead is so big it takes 3-4 business days.
In a Kahoot, and you're the Twin Tower terrorist: terrorist kill streak 2,996.
An orphan boy at my school did really bad in a test and started crying.
I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”
How to get your woman to come upstairs? Say you are naked.
What do Emos say to each other?
"I like your cuts, G."
What's the difference between a cheater and your mom?
They both cheated!
Last night I had the strangest dream!
I sailed away to China!
And I caught the coronavirus!
You said you needed to wash your hands!
Didn't want no one else to touch you! What does that mean?!
And you said!!
Ain't nothing gonna break my lungs 😤!
Ain't no way of slowing Covid down!
Oh no I've got to keep on coughing!!!
I can't sleep, that's because you're dead.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Pornhub is down, your mum's Facebook will do.
Your hairline looks like a brick wall.
My friend: Yo stupid.
Me: Is that right, and what exactly have you done in your lifetime that makes you Einstein?
My friend: *rolls eyes and says whatever.*
Me: Keep on rolling them, you might find your brain in there.
What's worse than having ants in your pants?
Uncles.
Your hairline is an artificial fact.
Gina: Maryen? Karlya? Amber? Kristie? Why isn't it listed that she's here?
Zari: Your sister isn't listed in the meantime, just relax.
Gina: That still doesn't answer why she's not listed. I want her to see me!
Zari: Anyway, it will be time for your medications, we have the gixen and the Uiasends.
Gina: Do you know my sister's name?
Zari: Yes. Her name is Jalien.
Gina: Fine, I don't care!!!