Yours jokes

Is your hairline a time traveler, because it went way back?

Your hairline goes farther back to Rosa Parks' seat.

What's worse than a failed suicide, you ask?

I fail suicide because you forgot to do the dishes and your parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you, not yourself.

If your name is Jack, I think you are a stupid person that leaves their friends and blocks them on everything.

When the husband said "Is your ass so big?" she said "Because I am holding my shit."

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

You're so ugly your mirror shattered.

What is an orphan's least favorite show? “How I Met Your Mother.”

If you're ever bored, just punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?

Your face makes onions cry.

Your mama so fat when she sits on the toilet it sings, "ABC, 123, get your fat ass off of me!"

Did you know that if you die you can still be a part of family game night!

All you have to do is have your family cremate you and put you in an hour glass, and the games that use hour glasses, well, you will be a part of family game night.

Guess the joke.

Your girlfriend.

Your mama is so fat, when I think of her in my head, she just broke my neck.

Bob: Can I come to your house to meet your family?

Orphan: I don't have a family.

Patient: Doctor, every time I look in a mirror, I feel ill, as if I'm about to throw up. What's wrong with me?

Doctor: I don't know, but your eyesight is perfect.

Dad: No, Timmy, you don't have to worry, there is no monster sleeping under your bed, it sleeps every night in the bed next to me.

Being an orphan isn’t all bad.

On the bright side, all your snacks are family sized.

You say to your slow friend: "Damn, you're slower than Stephen Hawking!" And that takes some talent.

All of a guy's sons came out gay. He ordered 10 shots in a bar.

The bartender asks, "Do you have anyone in your family who likes women?"

The man said, "My wife does!"