Yours jokes

POV: You're sitting here waiting for a good joke. I wait, unfulfilled.

A poor person came up to me and said, "You're ugly." I said, "You remind me of Spider-Man: No Way Home."

What do you do when you see a naked dead girl?

Check your map, you're obviously going in circles.

Guy: Whose place? Mine or yours?

Girl: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

I thought a waitress said to me, "You're good looking." In fact, she was asking if I'd like some pudding.

Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.

Your mama is so ugly whenever she threw a boomerang, it refused to come back.

Your forehead and your hairline must be friends, because they go way back!

Your mom is so fat that when she went on top of one of the Twin Towers, it collapsed.

Your mom is so weak, when she jumped from the Twin Towers, her baby became disabled.

What is Chuck Norris' favorite Sonic song?

"Open Your Heart."

When you're working in the Twin Towers, but you have to turn your computer to airplane mode.

What's the best way to prank your blind girlfriend?

Fill her closet with see-through clothes.

You're in Australia. Your forehead is the reason why Africa is so hot.

I have returned. Anyways, what do you call it when you're actually in Panera Bread, being in Panera Bread?

My mom: Your life could be worse. You could be Tracy Latimer.

Me: I wish I were Tracy Latimer, then someone would kill me.

Your momma so ugly, when the Kool-Aid man burst in the door, he said, "Oh no!"

Kid: Which were me, are your parents?

Orphan: What are parents?

Old people kept saying "you're next" to me at weddings, so I started saying it to them at funerals.

My husband and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.

If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.