You're jokes
Your forehead is so huge, you don't have dreams, you have movies. Follow me on Instagram: _zer0x3.
You know what? I know five fat people, and you're four of them!
If someone is mean to an orphan just say, "I will call your mum," and make them cry even more.
I bet you eat your cereal with water because your dad never came back with the milk.
There are five cows on a farm, one mamma cow and four baby calves. The first baby walks up to the mom and asks, "Momma, why is my name Rose?" The mommy cow replies, "Well honey, a rose petal fell on your head when you were born." The next calf comes up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Lily?" The mother replies, "Because honey, a lily petal fell on your head when you were born." The third baby comes up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Daisy?" The momma cow again replieds, "Well, when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head." The final baby walks over and says, "Huh Ruh Buh Duh!" The momma cow says, "Shut up, Cinderblock!"
Your hairline is like the universe, still waiting to be discovered.
Your mom's so heavy that it caused Atlas, the Titan, to slip a disc.
Do you know Putin?
Put in these balls in your mouth.
My mom showed me that she could deep throat a banana. I asked how you know how to do that. My mom said, "I practice on your stepfather."
Are your parents bakers? Because you're a cutie pie.
Are you a loan? Because you've got my interest.
Is your dad a boxer? Because you’re a knockout!
If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.
Are you an artist? Because you’re really good at drawing me in.
I believe in following my dreams. Can I have your Instagram?
If you were a fruit, you’d be a fine-apple.
If you were a flower, you'd be a daaaaaamn-delion!
Why are uncles like curries?
Because bad ones hurt your asshole.
Your life.
What's your religion?
Yo mama so fat when the doctor saw her weight on the scale he said, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number!"
Conversation between a little baby and a lady👇
👱LADY: Hi. 💂LIT.BABY: (No reply) 👱LADY: What is your name? 💂LIT.BABY: (No reply) 👱LADY: How old are you? 💂LIT.BABY: (No reply) 👱LADY: What is your mom's name? 💂LIT.BABY: (No reply) 👱LADY: What about your dad? 💂LIT.BABY: (No reply) 👱LADY: Can you spell your name? 💂LIT.BABY: (No reply) 👱LADY: Can you spell GOD? 💂LIT.BABY: (spelling) G.O.D
If a little baby can spell GOD, what about you? Just spend some minutes and type "GOD" if [you] know [that you] will sleep and wake up tomorrow by GOD's grace, ignore if you are living by power. MINE: GOD 😃
You're so fat that you were the iceberg that made the Titanic sink.
Your girlfriend/boyfriend says: "I'm dating your uncle..." You start crying and you look under the bed and your uncle says: "Damn."
I got a bowl of rice that you're formed like, an ice cube.
What's the difference between a good TV show and a gay man?
One makes your day and one makes your whole week.
Little Johnny is walking around and peaks in his parents' room, catching them having sex, so he asks, “What are you guys doing?” and they reply “Nothing, nothing! We’re just uh, making cake,” and they send him away.
So he continues walking around and he hears some strange noises coming from his brother’s room, so he walks in and catches his brother and his brother’s girlfriend having sex and then asks him “What are you guys doing?” and his brother yells “Get out! We're making cake!”
So Johnny leaves and goes to his room. The next day the whole family is at the dinner table and Little Johnny turns to his sister and says “So, you and your boyfriend were making cake last night huh!” and she replies “OMG! How'd you know!?!?” and Johnny replies “Because, I licked the icing off the couch” ayyyyyy.