You're jokes
Me: What is the difference between your mom and a mosquito?
Friend: Let me guess, they both suck you.
How to kick a deaf person off the plane:
Step 1: Pretend to yell and get some friends to do it, too.
Step 2: Tell your friends to raise both of their hands.
Step 3: He's out of the plane on a parachute.
Doctor: “I have good and bad news.”
Patient: “Give me the good news first.”
Doctor: “Your test results are back and you have only two days to live.”
Patient: “That’s the good news? What’s the bad news?”
Doctor: “I’ve been trying to reach you for two days.”
Tell an emo, "Do you get jealous when your phone dies?"
Irritable Bowel Syndrome saved me from depression...
It’s hard to feel empty when you’re so full of shiii fuck ur mom.
Why was Liverpool better than Man United? We won 5-0, and you have a sex offender on your team.
I'd mop the floor with your face, but you might just mess it up more.
Friend: Your t-shirt is cringe.
Me: You should go get the Covid test because one of their symptoms is no taste.
"Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? You're adopted. Haley says she likes me more than you."
Your mom saw Uranus and never was the same in HD. :)
Guess what.
What?
Your mum saw your 1 inch.
Your lips are so big, it turns the Grand Canyon sideways.
Your hairline is lookin' so crusty like KFC chicken and be so discombobulated that it looks like satellite signals. It gives me flippin' sun radiation.
You think you're funny? Look at your hairline; it looks like a McDonald's sample.
Bully: My d*ck is longer than your password.
Me: Sorry mate, it's so short, get a longer one! 🤣
Bro, your humor is so bad I bet you would laugh at this.
A B 💿.
How is your cereal? Oh, wait.
Your mom is so fat, she wakes up on both sides of the bed.
Type this in your calculator:
5 days a week (type in 5),
6 different classes (type in 6),
7 hours a day (type in 7),
x
2 semesters (type in 2),
=
flip the calculator over ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°).
Who do you ask to wipe you? Your butler!