You're jokes

Your hair and your hairline must be best friends, 'cause they go waaaaay back!

Friend: Hi!

Me: Who are you?

Friend: ...your friend?

Me: What are you talking about? The doctor already said I couldn’t have any.

If you are a girl and your favorite movie as a kid was Mulan, they successfully made a man out of you.

Your mom's so poor, she chased the garbage truck with her grocery list.

If you text your crush and they leave you on read, just know that "read" has four letters. You know what also has four letters? "Mine." So that basically means that you are theirs. :)

Man, your hairline is so bad it started from the beginning of the month to the end!

You're so fat that you broke Thanos's snap!

Your mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale the doctor asked for her weight, not her phone number.

Why did the orphan girl cry during sex?

Because her boyfriend said "Who's your daddy?"

BAJAHAHAHHAA

Your hairline so far back, it's a wide receiver for the Minnesota Vikings.

Dad: Hey, uh... you're adopted.

Dog: *frown*

An orphan boy at my school did really badly on a test and started crying. I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”

When an American goes on a scale, the other person will say, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number!"

My gf/bf said: "I'm dating your uncle!" You cry and you look under your bed and your uncle says: "Damn."

God needed an extra two hands to make your fat ass of a mother.

My husband and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.

If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

Kid: Which were me, are your parents?

Orphan: What are parents?

Your forehead and your hairline must be friends, because they go way back!

I didn't break my back in the accident, thankfully.

But I can break yours today, hopefully.

You're so fat that when they tried to print a picture of you through the computer, they couldn't fit you in the whole picture because you were so big!