You're jokes
If you're bored, just punch an orphan. It's not like they can tell their parents.
God, you're more toxic than white phosphorus.
Little Johnny was living with his grandpa during the summer. Well, grandpa had a beer, and Johnny said, "Grandpa, let me get a sip of that." Grandpa said, "Well, lil Johnny, does your d**k reach your a**?" And lil Johnny said, "Well no sir." And grandpa said, then no, you can't.
Later that day, papaw (grandpa) had a cigar, and Johnny said let me get a hit of that, and papaw asked, "Well, Johnny, does your d**k reach your a**?" And Johnny said no again. Then papaw was shooting his gun, and Johnny asked if he could shoot it, and grandpa asked Johnny if his d**k reached his a**, and Johnny said no.
Well, after supper, Johnny's grandma made Johnny some ice cream (the most amazing bowl of ice cream EVER), and grandpa said, "Johnny, let me get a bit of that ice cream," and Johnny asked papaw, "Well, papaw, does your d**k reach your a**?" And papaw said, "Well, Johnny, as a matter of a fact, it does," and Johnny said, "Good, now go f**k yourself because you ain't getting none of my ice cream!"
God sent a kid to the principal's office for giving a blind kid sunglasses and said, "Don't let the sun damage your eyes!"
Fuck you and your shitty family!
Friend, you're bold and fat.
Me: Bro, go to the bathroom and look at the mirror. You will probably break it.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Wilma.
Wilma who?
Wilma dik fit in your mouth.
Your mum is stupid, just like you.
Your forehead is so big, a whole jungle grew on it.
You're an alcoholic!
Your mom saw Uranus and never was the same in HD. :)
Your mom is so ugly, she's the reason he swerved.
Your mom so ugly that Paul Walker died.
Your forehead is so big, it's bigger than a school!
Your forehead is so big, Megamind thought he was your long lost sibling.
Your forehead is so big that Mastermind thought you were his long lost brother!
"Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? You're adopted. Haley says she likes me more than you."
If the noose breaks, stab yourself!
If the knife is dull, shoot yourself!
If the gun's out of ammo, *YOU'RE HERE TO SUFFER ETERNALLY.*
What did the old chimney say to the young chimney?
"You're too young to smoke!"
That's not even a bad joke-
Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"