You're jokes
I’m lost. Can you give me directions to your heart?
I saw an orphan on the street. I said, "Where are your parents?" He cried and said, "My mum and dad died in a car crash!" 😆😆😂😂🤣
Your hairline is so far back that your dad still can't find his way back home.
Your hairline shape is so badly shaped like a M, me and my friends thought it was McDonald's.
Your mama's so fat that she's bigger than the Titanic.
You know you're fucked when the speed bump screams.
Say this to your significant other (or your weird friends!)
Are you an unsafe staircase? 'Cause you look like you could use a railing.
I got in trouble in school today. The teacher said, "I'm gonna call your parents!"
I said, "Let me know when you find them." <3
Is it necrophilia if they die while you're having sex and you just don't realize?
That's what happened to my dog.
I was gonna roast you about your chin, but I didn't know which one to talk about.
Knock knock. "Who's there?" Not your grandpa, he crashed the plane.
When your plane heads for New York...
Your momma is so ugly, the director thought she was a real zombie.
One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV. His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.
The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.
The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuBuDuRDeEDeRdUuUuU!!!" "SHUT UP CINDER BLOCK!!!"
One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV.
His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.
The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.
The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuUDeEeEeDrrrrrrrrr!!!" "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!!!"
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not your dad.
What does a gun and gum have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
Don't tell me I haven't got balls. I just happen to wear mine on my chest, and I can guarantee they're a lot bigger than yours!
"Squid Game" doll be like: "Gugu la gu, your mom, my balls!"
Dad: We are giving your toys to the orphanage.
Kid: Why?
Dad: So you won't get bored.