What do you call a train that stalls?
The little engine that couldn't!
You Jokes
What do you call a bad joke?
A bad Noah!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A dino-snore!
Wanna hear a pun?
Welp, I'll punch you with one!
What's the difference between a baby and a pizza?
One does not crow when you put it in an oven.
Hi, how are you? Busy doing right? I just texted. Me and my dad were just texting.
What is the difference between you and my dad?
Nothing.
What do orphans, parents, and a ball have in common?
If you throw them, they both will never come back.
A blind man walks into a bar and starts to swing his guide dog around his head. The bartender asks him nervously, "Are you okay?" The blind man replies, "Yeah, I’m just looking around!"
Scientist time travels into the year 2024.
Scientist: So, what happened with the storming of Area 51?
Pedestrian: Oh, you mean The 51 Massacre?
You really can't call Stalin bad, just think about the kids that depression.
Because all I do is pound it, man. I would put you on my "600 Pound Life" if you didn't weigh 1,000.
Pickup line: Are you the internet? 'Cause I feel a connection.
What do you get when you cross an atheist an insomniac?
Someone who stays up all night wondering if there's a dog.
Want to hear a pun?
Well, I'll punch you with one!
Becky: Rob, you're so stupid! Anything that you say is stupid!
Rob: .....BECKY :3
Iron Man: Where are you from?
Thor: Asgard.
Iron Man: Do you mean ass guard?
What do you call a restaurant that sells food that contains weed?
McBongald's.
Are you made of Gold, Titanium, Sulfur, Titanium, and Carbon?
'Cause damn, you lookin' kinda Au Ti S Ti C.
What do you get when a topless blonde rubs sun tanning oil on a topless brunette?
Your camera.
