You jokes
To Mr. Nice Guy, you are nice, sweet, and caring! I am so grateful to be your friend!
What do you call a Democrat that is a progressive?
A Democrat that lost in a presidential election.
Hey, I just wanna be in bed. I just wanna stay ahead. I just feel like I am dead, And I like that color red. Hey, I am not the big fat loser, And you're just a big accuser, You user and excuser.
Say this to you sister, toxic BF, anyone :)
Deku: Hey, Todoroki?
Shoto: Wht?
Deku: I just found out on the news that your dad froze to death. Do you know who did it?
Shoto: :)
Man, we all have the one cool sibling, then the strong sibling, and then you, the one who plays on their iPad or computer all day. Then, when you are on vacation, you are doing nothing at all.
Memes
How can you tell a blonde likes you? She ducks you two nights in a row.
What egg do you buy an orphan?
Free range.
If you need help, you will need trash, 'cause you the trash.
Congratulations! 10 years+ record of hide and seek with your parents, and they're still hiding!
They hide so well, they probably forgot about you. Mwah. <3
When you were born, your mom said you were out of bounds, so you went flying out of the hospital.
What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
"PENIS WAIT WHAT OENIS SUCK MINE DADDY?" Sorry, you are an orphan.
1. Are you talking to me because I think you talked to my backside?
2. Your mom must taste good because it is always in your mouth.
3. My foot lasts longer than your life.
What does a refrigerator and a gay male have in common?
Only one farts when you pull the meat out. 🌝🌝🌝
Husband: I look fat, can someone compliment me?
Wife: You have good eyesight.
If you punch an orphan, they can't do anything; they can't tell their parents.
A disabled man stands up.
A blind man says, "You can stand?"
A deaf man says, "You can see?"
A mute person says, "You can hear?"
The disabled man says, "You can talk!"
Doctor: "What the actual f**k"
When you find out your great grandpa killed Hitler.
I went to a depressed person and said, "Do you wanna hang with me?"
My mom said, "Don't jump off, we need you."
I said, "No," then I jumped off a building and died.